In honour of Mother's Day I was asked to speak in church about being a young Mother. I thought I would share:
Elle is God’s example to me of his faithfulness. To say she was a surprise would be an understatement. Shock, fear, tears, anxiety and feelings of depression all followed the appearance of a little blue line, but I am getting ahead of myself.
My husband Matt and I met while attending Liberty University in Virginia. After dating for nine months we got engaged and married nine months later. We lived in Virginia for a year before moving to Canada. Fresh out of school, like any new graduate, we felt as though we had the skills that any employer would be foolish to turn down. Finding jobs proved to be more difficult than we originally anticipated. Unfortunately for us, our return to Canada was perfectly timed with the worst economic down turn since the great depression. Determine to make it on our own, we moved out of my parents house and accepted jobs working the afternoon shift at a factory. Soon after that Matt accepted a job with State farm, a job that would later prove to be part of God’s perfect plan for us. At the time, although I was excited for him, I was left in the factory alone, seeing Matt midnight on Fridays until Sunday. Not the picture perfect schedule for two newlyweds literally living on love. I was often reminded of these verses
2 Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, 3 because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. 4 Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.
I ignored many of the traditional signs of pregnancy writing them off to stress, but when the fatigue, random carsickness, and small mood swings didn’t subside we thought we would take a pregnancy test just to be sure. Never in a million years did I expect that I would actually be pregnant. When the test came back positive I stared in disbelief …this couldn’t possibly be right. I had just finished my Master’s degree, and was ready to change the world, before starting a family. All the plans I had made would now have to change. We didn’t own our home, I had a less than the perfect job, and Matt and I hadn’t done many of the things we planned to do before we had children.
I was not one of those lucky girls that glows throughout her pregnancy…in fact I was so far the other way I could barely look in the mirror each morning. Morning sickness plagued me morning, noon and night. I could often be found on the side of the road… you get the point. I didn’t seem to be getting any breaks. I was interviewing for jobs but the second they found out I was pregnant they ran for the hills. Matt and I often questioned whether we made the right choice moving to Canada and feared the future. But God’s plans were bigger then I could ever imagine. Four months into my pregnancy I started a job in communication and development for a camp in Muskoka. I was thrilled for this opportunity to put my schooling to use, but even more excited that post pregnancy I would able to work from home and raise my child.
Again the Lord reminded me that it was not my plan but God’s plan for me. Part way through my maternity leave my position at Muskoka Woods changed making it impossible to work for them and raise a family. Frustrated with my luck, I started my job search again. This week I was offered a position at Beginning Pregnancy Care Centre fundraising and counseling women who are experiencing unplanned pregnancy’s. God is using my gifts in fundrasing, my experience of being a mother and providing for our family in ways I would have never expected.
God has shown his faithfulness from day one. Matt and I have been so blessed with the support of family and friends. Our parents, grandparents, and family all prayed us through my pregnancy. Our friends supported us in ways they probably don’t even recognize. Visiting Tim and Jen in the hospital following Charlotte’s birth and then my sister Lindsay and brother-in-law Jared with the birth of their baby girl Abby a few weeks later eliminated our delivery and hospital jitters. These veteran parents calmed our nerves and gave us advice on how to be prepared for our big day.
God showed his faithfulness in Crestwicke’s nursery, a nursery that has virtually sat empty for years. Elle was the third of four baby girls to be born this year. Charlie Cairns, Emma Fisher and Ella O’Conn add fresh faces in our Sunday school program and their Mommy’s have served as a support system for me. I love exchanging milestones and clothing sales with my fellow Moms.
The Crestwicke community has also been invaluable in our lives both as Godly examples and through your support. This congregation is full of Mother’s I desire to model my life after. Mother’s who probably didn’t have all the answers when they got started but have trusted in the Lord to guide their steps.
I LOVE being a Mom. God has blessed me with the most beautiful easygoing baby girl in the world. In a season that seemed dark and scary Elle has brought a freshness and new life. Her energy and enthusiasm reminds me daily to have faith like a child. Everyday this little person taps me on the shoulder and says you are not in control, put today in the hands of the Lord.
Proverbs 3:5 Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding.
I can’t be the perfect mother, and that’s not what’s expected of me. Some days the house is a mess and the laundry doesn’t always get done, but I’ve learned take joy in the small things and enjoy every minute with my baby girl. I put my day in the hands of the Lord and then hold on for dear life. I often question if I am doing the right thing or if I am a good Mother, but at the end of the day when we put on our worship music and Elle bobs to the beat and claps her hands we know she’s a child of God’s and perfectly cared for.